How can I gain some control over this BOA without taking all the administrative actions away from the DCMA rep. I want them to still do their job, but let the contracting Officer and the procurement team know if they are extending the dates and when orders are definitized. I requested this action before on an ADO and after awhile I went onto EDA and found that the ACO did 7 modification, some to extend the date.
Based on your question and Background information, the following steps are recommended. First, ensure your supervisor is aware of the situation and that you cc them on any type of formal communication. Second, pursue informal communication by talking with the ACO but have your facts pertinent to the situation in order. Finally, if you are unable to reconcile the ACO's reasoning and don't feel their actions are justified, then you should pursue talking to the ACO's supervisor.
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You also may want to consider following up on your concerns all the way to the Director of the Contract Management Office to rectify the situation. Keep in mind that if you don't want the ACO involved in a particular administration function, an alternate Memorandum of Understanding or Agreement could be issued outlining the particulars of their limited contract administration role and responsibilities. Keep in mind that negotiating an alternative contract administration agreement with the ACO could be very time consuming and require high level signatures.